The Angelcats
by Tokimeki
Summary: Duo is kidnapped by the Angelcats on Queen Annebell, ruler of the Angelcats, orders for it to be so. Havoc ensues. Slight DxR, everyone-bashing.


The Angelcats or Creepy Little Talking Cats with Wings  
  
By: Tamayo  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing, I never said I did. Moron.  
  
Warnings: A *lot* of OOC, and small, miniscule bit of R+D which really just comes from the insanity and OOCness, and um, that's it.  
  
Author's Note: Oh, before I start writing, all the Angelcats belong to me. I am their creator/owner or something, they are at least partially mine and all that stuff. um copyright 2000-2003? Just don't use them in your stories. Not like you would want to anyways, but I've always wanted to say that. and a warning to you few readers who have risked their sanity to read this fic... IT IS STUPID.  
  
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Duo was dreaming of little kitties with wings flying around clouds. Their wings were always white, but the cats themselves were varying colors. He woke up later and ran to tell Heero he was going crazy.  
  
"HEERO I'M GOING INSANE I HAD CREEPY LITTLE TALKING CATS WITH WINGS IN MY DREAM I DON'T WANNA GO INSANE!" Duo yelled. But as Duo stepped into Heero's room, he saw a cat sitting in the window and he fainted.  
  
"What's wrong with Duo?" Heero wondered out loud. He saw Quatre's friend's cat in the window and wondered if Duo was scared of cats or something. Duo had been yelling something as he came down the hallway, but Heero couldn't understand him. He picked up Quatre's friend's cat and walked downstairs, nearly tripping over the unconscious Duo in his doorway.  
  
"How inconsiderate to take a nap in my doorway" murmured Heero as he walked off, down the stairs, and gave the cat back to Quatre's friend.  
  
"Thank you for bringing back my cat" the person said. Then Quatre's friend ripped off his mask to reveal he was actually Quatre. And Quatre (the other one!) ripped off her mask to reveal she was Relena. Then they looked at each other, and pulled each others' SECOND mask off and Relena was really Dorothy and Quatre was really Relena. (Kinda confusing @.@?) Dorothy and Relena laughed at Heero's shocked expression.  
  
"Where is Quatre?" asked Heero.  
  
"We kidnapped him and hid him in Cat Heaven" Dorothy laughed.  
  
"How much alcohol have you had?" Heero asked suspiciously.  
  
"Dunno. Some" Dorothy said. Relena and Dorothy started laughing. Heero sweatdropped. He walked off to move an 'inconsiderate' person from his doorway. But Duo just woke up...  
  
"HEE-CHAN KILLER CREEPY THINGS WITH WINGS THAT CAN TALK THEY ARE CATS THEY ARE MAKING ME INSANE" Duo yelled.  
  
"Cats that can talk? With wings? Yeah, right" Heero said, leaving Duo to be insane by himself.  
  
---  
  
Bobbie sighed. Why on Heaven did Annie give HER all the tasks? Oh well. She went to get her teammates, Talon (her brother), Jerry (her younger brother), Baby (her best friend), and FurrPurr (a young orphaned (his parents didn't die) Angelkitten that Bobbie took under her wing). She explained the problem they had to fix for queen Annebell.  
  
"All I can say is I pity the poor fool who grew his/her hair longer than 'Queen Annebell'" Bobbie remarked.  
  
"You an' me both, pal" Baby said. Then the 5 of them walked to the gates of cat heaven and gave their little permission form from Annie to leave to the Gate Guards. Gate Guards gave everyone the creeps. They were navy blue fur colored cats that were really strong and even the air around the was cold. But they must be good cats, because they came to heaven... never mind that. The gate Guards read the form and chuckled.  
  
"You guys have ANOTHER TASK! HAHA!" they laughed. The little group of 5 cats hurried through the now opened gates, spread their long white feathered wings and soared down to the Winner estate where they would find the person they must bring back to Queen Annie. They all landed one by one in the window sill. There was an insane longhaired boy lying on the floor asleep when suddenly his eyes fluttered open and he started to scream.  
  
"CREEPY LITTLE TALKING CATS WITH WINGS! CREEPY LITTLE TALKING CATS WITH WINGS! CREEPY LITTLE TALKING CATS WITH WINGS!" He yelled. From downstairs, Heero heard him and started to dial 1-800-MENTAL-ME for some professional help for Duo, when he thought, as crazy as it seemed, he should see if the braided boy really did see 'CREEPY LITTLE TALKING CATS WITH WINGS'. So he walked upstairs.  
  
When he arrived he nearly died of shock. It was 5 cats with white, feathery wings!!! There was a motley colored one who looked like someone took orange and black paint and applied it to her fur it tiny dabs, with one tiny patch of white on the bottom of her chin and the very rare occasional small dab of creme color (Bobbie). The one beside her was the biggest, and he was pure black, with shiny yellow eyes (Talon). The one beside him was a mini- replica of the other black cat (Jerry). Besides the smaller black cat was a smaller orange-with-white-stripes kitten (FurrPurr). The last one was a lot like the motley colored one with different patterns of paint but same colors and same fashion (Baby). Bobbie said,  
  
"Okay, which one of you people has the longest hair in the house?" Heero pointed at Duo. The 5 cats flew over to him and flew him out the window back to cat heaven.  
  
"That wasn't so hard" commented Talon as they landed before Queen Annebell with Duo.  
  
"You're right" Jerry said as they dropped Duo on his ass.  
  
"OWW! That hurt!" He cried. He was just kidnapped by talking cats(o.o). The one in front of him had a long ponytail starting between her ears and trailing down the back of her throne for about 2 feet.  
  
"You can shut yo big mouth, yo bloody human" said Annebell.  
  
"YOU'RE A *BLEEP*ING PURPLE CAT WHO CAN *BLEEP*ING TALK AND YOU HAVE *BLEEP*ING LONG HAIR AND *BLEEP*ING WINGS!" Duo yelled.  
  
"Yeah yeah yeah" Annebell said. "What is your reason for having long hair?" she asked him  
  
"Ummm, because I don't like cutting my hair?"  
  
"That's not as important as my hair being longer than everyone else's! Chop off his braid" Annebell ordered. The were about to chop off his hair when Quatre (Who had been hidden there in cat heaven and no one but Dorothy and Relena knew it) ran up and protected Duo.  
  
"RUN DUO!!!" Yelled Quatre.  
  
"Where to, Quatre?" Asked Duo.  
  
"Ummm, The Magic School Bus" Said Quatre.  
  
"You haveta come too"  
  
"Okay"  
  
Then they tapped their heels together once and did a stork stand and yelled "THEIR IS NO PLACE LIKE THE BEST PIZZA RESTRAUNT IN TOWN!!!" Then they dissapeared. But they reappeared in Barney's classroom, full of tellitubbies eating pizza on a magic schoolbus. They were about to have some pizza when the door opened and Dorothy (From the wizard of OZ), Toto, the lion, the scarecrow person, and a can of oil walked in. Some guy named Corry Molten walked in and saw barney and the teletubbies and asked for their autographs(BTW barney was the bus driver) and after he got them a dork named Kenny (not from South Park) came in crying that his 1st edtion tellitubbies trading card was ripped by a girl named Natasha, his girlfriend. Then Duo and Quatre decided it was time to leave that place coz it was getting too hectic and they stepped out into Pokemon Land full of little pikachus running around going "Pika pika pika" and then they screamed and said  
  
"THERE IS NO PLACE LIKE HOME!" and got transported home.They told Heero and Trowa and Wufei everything about cat heaven and the teletubbies and how they didnt know barney could drive and..... so on. Trowa, Heero, and Wufei looked at each other, and nodded. Trowa called 1-800-PROFESSIONAL-HELP- PLEASE and then a car labelled Rick's Cafe and Asylum pulled up and put Duo and Quatre in straight jackets and put them in the back of the car. They were just hoping things would finally be more normal when Relena and Dorothy came in and did the hokey pokey and then sat down on the tabel and cried. Trowa asked  
  
"Whats wrong" and they replied  
  
"You guys found quatre"  
  
"Yeah and we thought we hid him well"  
  
"No to mention Corry Molten has an autograped card with Po Lala TinkyWinky and what ever the hell the other guy's name is plus barney's signature and picture on it"  
  
"I think that Barney is sexy"  
  
"Me too"  
  
"I saw him first Dorothy"  
  
"Well I had a crush on Lala for such a long time I forgot my own name!"  
  
"Lala is sexy"  
  
"Me too"  
  
"I think you're sexy too, dorothy"  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes"  
  
"Lets get married!"  
  
"Okies!" Then Dorothy and Relena ran off. Heero started to cry.He was losing his sanity in an insane world.Then he awoke with a start...phew! It was only a dream. But then horror dawned on him as he heard Duo's voice coming down the hall  
  
"HEERO I'M GOING INSANE I HAD CREEPY LITTLE TALKING CATS WITH WINGS IN MY DREAM I DON'T WANNA GO INSANE!" Duo yelled. But as Duo stepped into Heero's room, he saw a cat sitting in the window and he fainted. Heero sighed. This was going to a long long day.  
  
The End  
  
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Oh-kayyyy...I have gone of the deepend and i have weights tied to my neck. Um, feedback is appreciated, and, again, All angelcats belong to me me me me dont touch ALL MINE! *Blinks* Oops ^_^;;;*All readers sweatdrop as they did thru the whole stupid fic* And btw Kenny is a real guy in the actual world he is an enemy of my friend and so is Corry Molten but I don't like either of them either and they both suck and Natasha is a real person too and this stupid guy in my class says he always walks in on Natasha and Kenny screwing, even though no one beleives him he says it all day long he is gross too I wish I coulda insulted him in my story too. He also says Corry F*cked a watermelon but I think Corry is just his split personality. Oops have I bothered u people with my jabber about losers from my class? By the way the guy in my class who says all this stuff is called Tick oops I mean Daris its just he's so short he might as well be a tick. Blame this whole story on late night bordom, okies? But if ya like it, I might write a sequel....man thats SCARY O.O ALL FEEDBACK WELCOME EVEN FLAMES BUT ALL FLAMES SHALL BE FED TO MY PET PYTHON o.o After being read, of course. Then I will send my python to your house and he will spontaneouly combust on you. Okay I'm *really* tired sorry guys I think Im going insane by the morning I probably wont even remember writing this in the morning. Byesas!  
  
NOTE: o_O This is the third time I revised this fic. Lol. It's old, from my newbie days ^_^;; If I revised too much it would lose it's. charm. I tried to fix most of the dumbass spelling and grammar errors though. Lol. The little ending note (See above) is completely unedited from it's original form ^_^;; Wow, I even said "u" o_o;;;;; Anyways. As always, look both ways before you cross the street, mind your pints and quarters, remember your manners, and R & R ^_^ 


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